welcome to the Blog 

I honestly do not remember when I met Amanda…maybe a decade ago? Even though my family moved away from Saint John, we have kept in touch through Facebook. This month, they travelled that lovely new highway down to St George for their family pictures (just a little over 30 minutes from the West side of Saint John to St George now!).

Seeing how big her kids have grown made me a wee bit choked up…was Sydney not just a little brown eyed mopet of a toddler last week?

Even though it was November we were blessed with a wonderful warm day, gorgeous sunshine and everyone was in a light and happy mood! Could not have been more perfect!

I honestly do not remember when I met Amanda…maybe a decade ago? Even though my family moved away from Saint John, we have kept in touch through Facebook. This month, they travelled that lovely new highway down to St George for their family pictures (just a little over 30 minutes from the West side of Saint John to St George now!).

Seeing how big her kids have grown made me a wee bit choked up…was Sydney not just a little brown eyed mopet of a toddler last week?

Even though it was November we were blessed with a wonderful warm day, gorgeous sunshine and everyone was in a light and happy mood! Could not have been more perfect!

This is my first letter in a series called, ‘Letters to my Daughter’, published on the 10th of every month.

Dear Cecilia,

My fourth baby. Everyone told me I should be an old hand at this, after all having three babies prior, I seriously and confidently assumed I had seen it all. I envisioned a nice, easy, quick and natural labor…I saw myself handling my life, my small children’s lives with ease…after all, I knew what to expect. I also felt with certainty you were a ‘he’…

After all of our birth plans went out the window and 47 hours, you arrived peacefully and we joyfully discovered another daughter in our lives. Your siblings cheered with joy on the phone.

Only hours old I couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong but being an experienced mother, the nurses and I poo-pooed the concerns. Only a week later you were fighting for your life. For the first time I questioned all my abilities as a mother, my instincts were telling me the opposite of what the doctors and nurses were prescribing and I followed.

Sitting in that hospital room, 3am in the morning, I felt lost. I was homesick, I was heartsick over the situation and I felt as if I didn’t know you. All you could do was lay in that hospital bed, I felt as if we were losing time and had lost those moments of bonding. I felt immense guilt as if I had failed you in some way. I couldn’t make you better, our families were frustrated and everyday brought new doctors who suggested new solutions.

What I did do in the hospital was pray. I prayed for you, I prayed for me, I waited and you waited. Bringing you home was more exciting then your first homecoming! I even went out and bought you another new coming home outfit. You may have been the fourth but a second homecoming was a first!

Once at home, you grew stronger each day and we finally found our rhythm. Slowly we reintroduced ourselves and became better acquainted.

I knew you were a fighter and a cuddler but in the past month I have found you have a sense of humor and are terribly ticklish, you have a temper and hate to be burped because you feel the food should flow constantly.

As I stare at your long eyelashes (which you obviously did not inherited from me), big blue eyes and long feet (which we tease you about)…I wonder for your future. I know it will be bright, I know you have a few little obstacles, no more then some but too many for me, I know you will be my baby longer then your brothers and sister were.  For now I will enjoy this special time; how your eyes light up when you recognize me, your big smiles and coos which melt my heart, how you instinctively snuggle against me and your sweet baby smell. I could stare at your for hours, your total perfectness and marvel at you; my little miracle, my little daughter.

If you enjoyed this you can go to my friend Heather Meyer’s blog at Heather Meyer Photography to read her ‘Letters to my Daughter’

This is my first letter in a series called, ‘Letters to my Daughter’, published on the 10th of every month.

Dear Cecilia,

My fourth baby. Everyone told me I should be an old hand at this, after all having three babies prior, I seriously and confidently assumed I had seen it all. I envisioned a nice, easy, quick and natural labor…I saw myself handling my life, my small children’s lives with ease…after all, I knew what to expect. I also felt with certainty you were a ‘he’…

After all of our birth plans went out the window and 47 hours, you arrived peacefully and we joyfully discovered another daughter in our lives. Your siblings cheered with joy on the phone.

Only hours old I couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong but being an experienced mother, the nurses and I poo-pooed the concerns. Only a week later you were fighting for your life. For the first time I questioned all my abilities as a mother, my instincts were telling me the opposite of what the doctors and nurses were prescribing and I followed.

Sitting in that hospital room, 3am in the morning, I felt lost. I was homesick, I was heartsick over the situation and I felt as if I didn’t know you. All you could do was lay in that hospital bed, I felt as if we were losing time and had lost those moments of bonding. I felt immense guilt as if I had failed you in some way. I couldn’t make you better, our families were frustrated and everyday brought new doctors who suggested new solutions.

What I did do in the hospital was pray. I prayed for you, I prayed for me, I waited and you waited. Bringing you home was more exciting then your first homecoming! I even went out and bought you another new coming home outfit. You may have been the fourth but a second homecoming was a first!

Once at home, you grew stronger each day and we finally found our rhythm. Slowly we reintroduced ourselves and became better acquainted.

I knew you were a fighter and a cuddler but in the past month I have found you have a sense of humor and are terribly ticklish, you have a temper and hate to be burped because you feel the food should flow constantly.

As I stare at your long eyelashes (which you obviously did not inherited from me), big blue eyes and long feet (which we tease you about)…I wonder for your future. I know it will be bright, I know you have a few little obstacles, no more then some but too many for me, I know you will be my baby longer then your brothers and sister were.  For now I will enjoy this special time; how your eyes light up when you recognize me, your big smiles and coos which melt my heart, how you instinctively snuggle against me and your sweet baby smell. I could stare at your for hours, your total perfectness and marvel at you; my little miracle, my little daughter.

If you enjoyed this you can go to my friend Heather Meyer’s blog at Heather Meyer Photography to read her ‘Letters to my Daughter’

Editing can make or break a picture. It is our goal as a photographer to get it right straight out of the camera…but let’s admit it, that does not always happen. There are many different programs you can use and all have their pro’s and con’s…personally I use Photoshop CS5 and Lightroom 3.

Now that being said there are many editing styles…you can edit heavily, enhancing and changing the picture to suit your vision, or lightly to just slightly. Finding my editing style has taken time and I still find myself evolving. There are also some editing boo-boos…changing the picture so frankly it just looks…well weird! I am guilty of doing this in the beginning!!

The other major boo-boo? Actions and presets!! These are basically short cuts for editing programs…I am not saying there is anything wrong with them, there are some wonderful actions and presets out there…they make pretty pictures in a the click of a button or two. But the key is knowing HOW to use them! When I was brand spanking new to photo editing and discovered these little shortcuts I thought I had hit pay dirt…after all, I was paying money for these little shortcuts and they make my pictures look awesomely professional…oh so wrong Carla!!  I abused them terribly, because #1. I didn’t know my style and #2. I didn’t know how to use them.

Through many courses on editing, and studying I have found my style is nice and clean and simple. I love bright pictures but I like seeing the subject first…not the editing style. There are fads in editing styles, what is popular now may look cheesy in a few years.

Here is an example of a picture I took over a year ago, the first is the picture straight out of the camera,

The second is me ruining the picture with the click of a button, ya I thought this was awesome…lol.

The last picture is how I edit today, I searched through my computer and pulled the original file and re-edited this picture how I would for a client and myself.

 You can see if it nice and bright, clean looking, not hard on the eyes:)

I know I will look at this picture in a decade and smile…but look at that over edited picture and slap my forehead;)

Editing can make or break a picture. It is our goal as a photographer to get it right straight out of the camera…but let’s admit it, that does not always happen. There are many different programs you can use and all have their pro’s and con’s…personally I use Photoshop CS5 and Lightroom 3.

Now that being said there are many editing styles…you can edit heavily, enhancing and changing the picture to suit your vision, or lightly to just slightly. Finding my editing style has taken time and I still find myself evolving. There are also some editing boo-boos…changing the picture so frankly it just looks…well weird! I am guilty of doing this in the beginning!!

The other major boo-boo? Actions and presets!! These are basically short cuts for editing programs…I am not saying there is anything wrong with them, there are some wonderful actions and presets out there…they make pretty pictures in a the click of a button or two. But the key is knowing HOW to use them! When I was brand spanking new to photo editing and discovered these little shortcuts I thought I had hit pay dirt…after all, I was paying money for these little shortcuts and they make my pictures look awesomely professional…oh so wrong Carla!!  I abused them terribly, because #1. I didn’t know my style and #2. I didn’t know how to use them.

Through many courses on editing, and studying I have found my style is nice and clean and simple. I love bright pictures but I like seeing the subject first…not the editing style. There are fads in editing styles, what is popular now may look cheesy in a few years.

Here is an example of a picture I took over a year ago, the first is the picture straight out of the camera,

The second is me ruining the picture with the click of a button, ya I thought this was awesome…lol.

The last picture is how I edit today, I searched through my computer and pulled the original file and re-edited this picture how I would for a client and myself.

 You can see if it nice and bright, clean looking, not hard on the eyes:)

I know I will look at this picture in a decade and smile…but look at that over edited picture and slap my forehead;)

Funny how life throws your curve balls…the plan and expectation was we would wait for mother nature to decide when the baby would arrive, baby was due Sept 1 but given my record for overcooking my kids I assumed mid Sept. Due to some dangerously low fluids they began inducing…47 hours later she arrived.

Once home I looked forward to some normalcy…the sleep deprived kind. But somehow this time it was different. She is my 4th child and I felt very confident that I should know what I was doing but instead we spent days in bed, me trying to coax her to eat and her crying and fussing and refusing…and something else felt off. So off…she would go very still and limp. From screaming to nothing.

A couple of doctor’s appointments later my fears were confirmed, she was not doing well. So, we moved into the regional hospital.

The diagnosis was failure to thrive, even with being tube fed she still lost weight and faced a few other health issues. There is nothing scarier than a doctor shaking their head and saying they didn’t know WHY.

Her blood pressure is unstable, her heart is misbehaving, she is having ‘grey spells’ and the doctors are as frustrated as we are. She is down from 7 lbs 11oz to 4 lbs 11oz.

So, Cecilia and I walk the halls at the Regional Hospital, we walk up and down paediatrics, chatting with nurses, getting to know other inmates/residents…we had long and deep conversations about fighting hard and the importance on eating. (My aunt commented she is the first girl in our family we prayed would gain weight)

After 5 weeks we are finally seeing some progress! New medications seem to be helping and she is calmer. I miss the kids, I miss home, I miss my bed. But we are where we should be. Thank you for the meal train and visits from my friends. We are hoping to get some day passes soon and come home.

Cecilia at 3 months old

Funny how life throws your curve balls…the plan and expectation was we would wait for mother nature to decide when the baby would arrive, baby was due Sept 1 but given my record for overcooking my kids I assumed mid Sept. Due to some dangerously low fluids they began inducing…47 hours later she arrived.

Once home I looked forward to some normalcy…the sleep deprived kind. But somehow this time it was different. She is my 4th child and I felt very confident that I should know what I was doing but instead we spent days in bed, me trying to coax her to eat and her crying and fussing and refusing…and something else felt off. So off…she would go very still and limp. From screaming to nothing.

A couple of doctor’s appointments later my fears were confirmed, she was not doing well. So, we moved into the regional hospital.

The diagnosis was failure to thrive, even with being tube fed she still lost weight and faced a few other health issues. There is nothing scarier than a doctor shaking their head and saying they didn’t know WHY.

Her blood pressure is unstable, her heart is misbehaving, she is having ‘grey spells’ and the doctors are as frustrated as we are. She is down from 7 lbs 11oz to 4 lbs 11oz.

So, Cecilia and I walk the halls at the Regional Hospital, we walk up and down paediatrics, chatting with nurses, getting to know other inmates/residents…we had long and deep conversations about fighting hard and the importance on eating. (My aunt commented she is the first girl in our family we prayed would gain weight)

After 5 weeks we are finally seeing some progress! New medications seem to be helping and she is calmer. I miss the kids, I miss home, I miss my bed. But we are where we should be. Thank you for the meal train and visits from my friends. We are hoping to get some day passes soon and come home.

Cecilia at 3 months old

Yes, I suck at blogging!! Partly because I have never been consistent at diary keeping or it could be I have been a wee bit preoccupied. One August 31, it was a special night…not only a blue moon but it brought us our fourth child, another daughter, Cecilia Elizabeth. Born at 7:13am, 7 lbs 11oz:)

The past 5 1/2 weeks have flown by…with many tales to tell but perhaps if I hold back it will force me to blog about it…

Please note the first photo, is NOT mine…it is from my sweet husband:)

Yes, I suck at blogging!! Partly because I have never been consistent at diary keeping or it could be I have been a wee bit preoccupied. One August 31, it was a special night…not only a blue moon but it brought us our fourth child, another daughter, Cecilia Elizabeth. Born at 7:13am, 7 lbs 11oz:)

The past 5 1/2 weeks have flown by…with many tales to tell but perhaps if I hold back it will force me to blog about it…

Please note the first photo, is NOT mine…it is from my sweet husband:)